Led Zeppelin Must Die

My grandson is almost seven years old and has been performing with his dad as Michael Jackson impersonators since he was three. Whenever he is not the "Gloved One," he also performs live as a rock-n-roll star.

His favorite song to sing and play guitar to is Whole Lotta Love by Led Zeppelin. Performing the song with his Gigi's (short for grandmother in denial) band backing him for three years, he thinks of the song as his.

It started out innocently, as Whole Lotta Yuv. Working the stage and handling the mic like a seasoned pro, he delights a crowd. Big friends (his words for adult fans) love him. Although he can't really play the guitar, he knows all the words and moves. From a distance, you would actually think he is playing it.

For the small price of a bag of Skittles, he gives a true performance, jumping up and down to the beat, putting every little grunt he can muster into the "unh, unh, unh, unh, whole lotta yuv, whole lotta yuv." Even when he makes up his own words like "I wanna bring you back around, and give you everything of my love" it is a pleasant surprise to not hear him say, " I wanna be your back door man and give you every inch of my love."

As I said, he is almost seven and is paying more attention to detail. One night before a recent performance, I found some vintage 1973 Led Zeppelin on Youtube.

He watched it intently as I tried to explain that those were the real guys who wrote and still own the song. After it finished, I couldn't wait for his impression.

Quite proud of myself, I asked, "So, what did you think? Did you see how they really rocked the guitar?"

"Those guys made that song?" he seemed somewhat puzzled.

Sensing his loss of ownership, I said,"Yes, they made that one and a whole lot more. But you can still sing it when you want to."

" Well, those guys are really old. So, if they die, then it can be only my song." sounding so matter of fact.

" That is not how it works. If they die, then their kids get to keep the song. "

Pondering for a bit, out came, " Then they just gonna have to die, cuz that is my song. And you can give his kids my Skittles."

That interaction was back in August. Since then, he has written two of his very own songs:" Cool Jam" and " Help Me." They are, in his own words, the best songs he has ever heard.

They should be available at a store near you in 2020.